Rock & Roll Wingwoman

About six years ago my friend Cheryl left for Austin. After enduring a tragic sequence of events, she's returned to the Dallas area. And this could not be more glorious for me because Cheryl is my longstanding rock & roll wingwoman. For years, she's been the one person who's always been willing to stave off sleep to make the journey into some of Dallas' most questionable clubs to see music.

When Cheryl came back, I had to brace her for all of the changes that had occured in small Dallas rock venues. Several of the venues have closed, most notably Trees and The Gypsy Tea Room. But the most disturbing change in Dallas music has been the horrible deterioration of the manners of its patrons. I'm referring to the assholes who are willing pay 25 bucks to see a show, but don't want to hear it, because they won't shut the fuck up. This happens at nearly every show I attend these days.

So Cheryl and I went to see Todd Snider last night at the Sons of Hermann Hall --- one of Dallas' coolest and oldest venues known for it's respectful patrons. But these days, even the Sons of Hermann is no longer safe, as Cheryl saw first hand. Todd Snider does a sort of renagade folk act in which his stage banter is as important as the songs he sings. He'll tell you a Mitch Hedberg like-story and then rip right into some equally absurd and funny song. Listening to every word of his show is important --- if you don't, something hysterical might slip by.

A group of three guys and one girl are standing next to Cheryl and I. And they're the ones --- the Dallas assholes of the evening who regard Snider's act as nothing more than a soundtrack to a really uninteresting documentary film featuring them and their banal lives. I stare directly at them with my patented "what in the name in all that's holy do you think you're doing?" look. They ignore it and keep talking. So Cheryl steps up to the plate with this direct confrontation.

Cheryl:"Excuse me. Could you talk a little louder? I can't hear your conversation over all this live music."

Male Dallas asshole: "Oh you can't? That's funny."

Cheryl: "I wasn't being funny. Shut up."

After mumbling for a bit, they shut up. It was beautiful.

God, I'm glad Cheryl is back.