Basic Cable-Inspired Halloween Costumes

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No doubt, the most common photograph taken at the State Fair of Texas.

Shittiest Autograph Ever

About 1975, when I was in the third grade, perennial just O.K. Texas Rangers catcher Jim Sundberg came to visit my elementary school in Richardson, Texas. This was a huge deal at the time because I'd never seen a real live celebrity --- local or otherwise --- before. He gave some speech about how we needed to stay in school and drink milk to have strong bones --- the usual sports-guy-to-kids speech. I'm not sure how Sundberg got roped into visiting Prairie Creek Elementary. It must have been a mandate from the Rangers' P.R. department or some sort of promotional deal. Yet at the end of his speech, all the kids got autographed photos of Sundberg. At the time, I didn't have any concept of sports autographs or what made them valuable or unique. That autographed photo was pinned to a cork board in my room for years. It wasn't until I was in the seventh grade that I realized that the autograph was shitty. It said: "Best wishes, from Dr. Pepper and Jim Sundberg."

Every Day

I'm glad this low low price is good every day in Pearsall, Texas because I tend to go through boxes of shotgun shells at a rate of --- shoot --- at least one every other day.

Crowded House, 09-02-07, Vancouver, B.C.

Wet rocker

Normally, I hate outdoor rock shows because --- oh, I don't know --- sometimes it rains? But it's OK if the show is outside in Vancouver's stunning Stanley Park and the band playing is the great Crowded House. I didn't even notice it was raining.